What ever happened to the good ol' days? Y'know – the days when a jilted would-be lover could spitefully douse the duplicitous shrew who broke
his heart with a pail full of fetid sludge and that be it. Why can the muck-encrusted no longer simply shamble away, never to be heard from again?
Maybe I'm just being sentimental. I've been to "the good ol' days," after all. Back in 1885, my good pal Clint Eastwood washed his hands of “Mad Dog” Tannen
by socking him into a cart of manure. Is it so much for me to want Veronica to go the way of “Mad Dog”?
See, I’m a man who’s living on borrowed time and I know that. Next time I get Backfisted To The Future, I’ll be zapped back into the past (2 June 2012, to be
precise,) where my current form, will be reconciled with that...Doppelgänger...who’s been seen wandering the globe. So, the fact is, I haven’t the inclination
to waste any more of my time dealing with Veronica. Unfortunately, however, I don’t like loose ends (nor do I like Veronica’s split ends, but I digress.)
As a result of Veronica’s meddling, I’ve got a loose end concerning one Tim Donst that needs to be, well… tightened. I could write that
he punted me in the groin in lieu of defeat during our last encounter but that would be crude. Instead, I’ll leave it to my world-renowned
personal physician, Dr. Charles McNider, to explain in painstaking detail the extent of the damage inflicted upon me by one Tim Donst:
[Due to its graphic nature, we have elected to redact this portion of Dr. Peck’s blog. We apologize for any
discomfort this may have caused. But, trust us – leaving it would have caused much more discomfort.]
So, you see – in light of all that (particularly the third paragraph on page six,) how could I not ask for a rematch? Which I did. And my wish was granted.
I’m a man living on borrowed time and I know that so I want to enjoy this Florida vacation. Scott Parker, Bryce Remsburg and I have a “Best Beach Bodies” photo shoot
planned with the Nitro Girls for an upcoming issue of WCW Magazine but we won’t be soaking up the rays we need if there’s a dark cloud looming
over “The Sunshine State.” That’s why, on 9 March, at "Watchmaker" in Orlando, when I tie up this loose end with one Tim Donst, I ask for two things:
A fair fight and clear skies with no chance of Veronica.